Joy of coupons

The following is a conversation I had about two months ago. It is unfortunatley not as rare as you might think.

customer: I want to buy these three things but they are too expensive.

Me: I'm sorry?....

customer: Give me the coupon price or I won't buy these.

Me: I'm sorry about that but I don't have any extra coupons. I will be happy to put these back on the shelves for you.

customer: Just change it in your computer.

Me: I cannot do that. I can give you a discount on one item if you sign up for our mailer.

customer: No. I don't need to sign up for anything. Just give it to me.

Me: I'm sorry. I cannot do that. Would you like to talk to a manager?

customer: (huffs out of the store)

Okay, not a lot of people seem to understand the point of coupons. They think that it is to save them money. It is not! The reasons that coupons were created was to get you into the store. I will happily give a coupon to a customer if I have one. Do Not Ask! Smart stores realize that you are already in the store and have no reason to supply them to the cashiers. Sometimes we have them left over from stuffing bags but that is very rare. Telling me about how evil I am because I do not have another coupon is not going to go anywhere. I don't take it personally. Heck, I just see it as a very stupid customer. If the point of the coupon is to get you into the store and you are here, I have no reason whatsoever to even think of giving you the discount. Actually, that is not true. If you sign up for a mailer/credit card/store promotion/ect. I will convince the register that you have a coupon. But that occurs whether I have the piece of paper or not.
If you want to make your cashier give you a coupon there are some rules to follow
1. Be nice. Rude people get nothing.
2. Follow that rules. Sign up for the stupid mailer even if you have already signed up for it 4 times and never received it. Not my fault. Just spend two minutes filling out your address and get the $3 off your puchase.
3. Try to go to the same cashier. If I recognize you as a regular, I will be more willing to make you happy.
4. Don't be afriad to pretend that you forgot it at home. Sometimes we push it through anyways if you are very nice and buying a lot.
5. Do not demand one. Asking is okay but don't be ticked off when we tell you that we don't have one.
6. If something is damaged and you still want it, point out the damage. Where I work I have permission to give a 75% discount if I tell the manager first so don't be afraid of the chip or scratch. You will probably be turning it towards the wall or covering it up with a craft project anyways.